God's Journey of Friendship

We had some wonderful speakers, who had been friends for many many years, come to speak to us on the topic of friendship. What a beautiful talk that it was....full of laughs and tears and hugs......just like real and true friendships should be!

First of all, they brought up the fact that God is very creative in how he brings friends together, in our busy, busy lives of raising young kids. We have some friends from college, some friends who are in the same station of life, some friends who are a few steps ahead of us in life, some friends God brought us together with through old flames, ex-boyfriends, husbands, coworkers, kids who were playing together in the mall play area then had tantrums when it was time to leave (Ok that was me :) However, however God brings friends into our lives, they are a real and true GIFT!

What makes friendships work anyway? Some things we came up with:
same interests
mutual investment of time and energy
time
sacrificial giving
transparency
forgiveness
trust
having FUN together!

Now, as mothers of young children who are trying our VERY best to raise loving, obedient, God-fearing children, it is sometimes hard to be a good friend....to invest in friendships when we are plain exhausted. But, it is important and we have to be creative with our time!

I Sam. 20:17b- "...And Jonathan had David reaffirm his oath out of love for him, because he loved him as he loved himself."

Another picture of friendship actually occurs when Jesus is in the garden, before He is about to be betrayed then led to the cross. He took his three disciples who were in His inner circle with Him to support Him during this difficult time: Peter, James and John.

Another picture in the Bible of how to DO friendship? Also from Jesus in John 13- Jesus takes his towel and washes the dirt from his disciples feet. He is serving them even in the lowest possible way....and He was the King of all Kings! We need to learn to come alongside our friends and be willing to serve.

Always rely on the Holy Spirit for guidance in friendships. He will direct. He will lead you. He will whisper in your ear when your friend truly needs you. You need to be attentive to His still, small voice.

So, what do we (and should we) look for in our closest confidants? 

Investment- it is costly, to be true, but what we reap is a true gift.
Integrity- have friends in different ages and stages in life- friends who are willing to encourage you...those who weep with you then rejoice in your most wonderful moments....and being willing to do the same for them!
Intentional Priorities- Do NOT be exclusive in your friendships. Encourage friendships with other women as well. Jealousy will breed discontentment and will kill friendships.

What will make friendships go sour and even die?

gossip
comparison
unequally yoked (you can be invested in many people's lives, but only go very deeply with those who share your same devotion to Christ)
jealousy (ie. girl drama)
unmet expectations

Making friends and keeping friends sometimes can be a hard business....but it is so very important to our lives. This continues to be a challenge to me to make time and priorities for some real deep and meaningful friendships!

Meeting Recap: Its All About LOVE

Be in prayer for the women who were unable to make it to our MOPS meeting this morning. I know there is some sickness going around.....and when the mama is sick, it makes caring for sick babies even harder!

We had a speaker today who talked to us about our very theme: LOVE as if your life depended on it. Love is something that we do not talk a lot about.....and if we examine HOW and WHY we are loving, or attempting to love people, it is very telling!

We know that the Lord says "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul and with all your strength." In light of this, we better learn how to LOVE correctly! This self-examination can be hard......but it can be so freeing as well! We need to learn to love both earnestly and intensely.

Our verse for the year: I Peter 4:7-11 says:

LOVE each other as if your life depended on it. LOVE makes up for practically anything. Be quick to give a meal to the hungry, a bed to the homeless-cheerfully. Be generous with the different things God gave you, passing them around so all get in on it: if words, let it be God's words; if help, let it be God's hearty help. That way, God's bright presence will be evident in everything through Jesus, and He'll get all the credit as the One mighty in everything- encores to the end of time. Oh, yes!

What kind of LOVE is this? This is Agape love which is the love the the Lord has for humankind. 

For example. When our child looks like this, it is likely time for that child to have a nap.

 Does he want a nap? No. Do he think a nap would be good for him? No. BUT, because we LOVE him, we know that the best thing he needs is a nap! God knows what is best for us, even when we do not understand, or even when we think we know better than Him what is best for us! He AGAPES us! 

What kind of "lover" are we?

 Extension Cord:  We are drawing love from people- not actually loving, but taking all the time. A more mature love is a giving type of love.

Empty Cup: We have a "fill me up" mentality. We want others to meet our needs.

The problem remains that we are looking out instead of up for our fulfillment. We need to break out the bottom of that cup.....or drill some holes into your cup like a planter......and allow God to flow THROUGH you. That is how to properly love. Christ wants to live and love through us and we need to allow Him to do that.

Here are some questions to ponder as we think more about this subject of love in our lives:

1. Can I see ways that I have been an extension cord, or an empty cup, or have had unrealistic expectations?

2. Can I see ways that I have morphed my desires?

3. Am I willing to repent?- to stop asking people to do what only God can do?

4. Am I willing to believe I am who God says that I am now?

5. Am I willing to receive from God so I can, above all else, love others deeply?

MOPS Meeting #1

What a wonderful, though a bit chaotic, first MOPS meeting we had today! I know a few moms could not make it this morning.....so I will recap a few thoughts here! When I do posts on recipes or crafts, I am actually going to make a separate post for each one so they are more easily accessible for the future.

This morning was a morning of introductions....sometimes it was hard to keep everything straight. However, it was SUCH an exciting morning as we welcomed many MANY new moms, new steering team members and some new mentor moms....some new to the area, some brand new moms, some more experienced moms but who had never been a part of a MOPS group! Whoever you are, whether this is your very first meeting, or you have years of MOPS under your belt, we are so glad to have you in our group.

Our children in the MOPPETTS classes did very well today! There were a few tears with drop-offs (even with those of us who have done this many times....kids will be kids!), but our MOPPETTS workers are such wonderful trained individuals! My boys both enjoyed the puppet times they had today. One son screamed in delight while the other son said "well, that was nice, but they were a little bit creepy." :) Our hope is that throughout this year as we are getting "filled up" and enjoying time with other mothers who are in our same station in life, that our children will also be enjoying getting to know some new friends, and also learning about the God that we serve as well, in an age-appropriate and fun way! Thank you to all you amazing workers who do us such a great service every single MOPS meeting. You go above and beyond and you are such a blessing to us all!

Our Women Ministry Leader came in for a brief devotional. She shared the verse for the year, which leads to our theme "Plunge: Love as if your life depended on it." I Peter 4:7-11 says:

Love each other as if your life depended on it. Love makes up for practically anything. Be quick to give a meal to the hungry, a bed to the homeless-cheerfully. Be generous with the different things God gave you, passing them around so all get in on it: if words, let it be God's words; if help, let it be God's hearty help. That way, God's bright presence will be evident in everything through Jesus, and He'll get all the credit as the One mighty in everything- encores to the end of time. Oh, yes!

Our steering team shared one way that they are "plunging in" this year. Some ways included:

being open to building relationships
clearing schedules to accommodate the deepening of friendships
building upon a growing relationship with the Lord
admitting that we are all not perfect; allowing ourselves to fail and realizing that God gives grace

As we gear up for this year, our prayer is that we will all think of ways that we can deepen our relationships- with new friends, existing friends, husbands, family, children and the Lord. As a steering team, we are so EXCITED to build a relationship with YOU. You are not alone.

If you did not make it to our meeting this time, we pray that life will allow you to make it next time. We did a craft today (which will be another post), and we have supplies for you. Make sure and get with your DGL to get the supplies!

The Gift of Fellowship

In my morning devos. this morning I came across this passage taken from "A  Woman After God's Heart" written by Elizabeth George. It fits in very nicely with our theme of "plunging" into relationships this year in MOPS! (Side note: this book is an incredible book for morning devos. that addresses how to grow in our main roles as women. I highly recommend it!)

Spiritual Growth: The Gift of Fellowship

As Jesus grew, He also "increased in favor with man" (Luke 2:52). Try these three ways to improve your relationships with people.

1. Mind your mind
             It's unavoidable. Your actions will reveal your attitude toward people. That's the message of yet another proverb: "For as he thinks in his heart, so is he" (Prov. 23:7). Thoughts that are critical, negative, harmful, and jealous not only go against God's Word (Phil. 4:8), but they spawn actions that are critical, negative, harmful and jealous. So train yourself to think loving, positive, sweet thoughts when it comes to other people.

2. Mind your mouth
            Our relationships with people are enhanced when we follow in the steps of the Proverbs 31 woman who "opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness" (Prov. 31:26). If her thoughts weren't wise or kind, her mouth was shut!

3. Mind your manners
             The number one way to be pleasing to God and approved by man is to be the servant of all. Our servant assignment from God is to give honor and preference to one another (Rom. 12:10). Regarding others as more important than yourself gives you the mind and manner of Christ (Phil. 2:4-5).

You and I are to focus away from self and outward to others; we are to become other-oriented. To do this, as mundane as it sounds, we have to train ourselves to, for instance, stop talking about ourselves (and our children) and instead talk about the other person. We may also have to learn some good manner, because love has good manners (I Cor. 13:5).

I love what Anne Ortland says. First she writes, "There are two kinds of personalities in this world, and you are one of the two. People can tell which, as soon as you walk into a room: your attitude says either "Here I am" or There you are."...

Are you a "There you are" person, looking around for how you can encourage someone with God's love? He can make it happen as you let Him grow you into a woman after His heart.